Better Than Me
by imboredoutofmymind
Summary: A songfic about one of my favourite couples Rose and Scorpius


**I think you can do much better than me  
After all the lies that I made you believe  
Guilt kicks in and I start to see  
The edge of the bed  
Where your nightgown used to be  
**

I sat on the edge of my bed, my stomach was all twisted and knoted up, my breath came out in gasps. _She's better off. _My hand swept over the spot where she use to sit, there was a small slope in the area where she sat.

"Hey dude are you coming?" asked Vinnie

"Nar mate, I'm fine" I said

"Get over it already" he said and with that he left in a sweeping motion. I stood up and started to pace the room, trying to get her beautiful image out of my mind, I couldn't it was stuck there. I choked out a sob. I sat on the ground, my back resting against my bed. My hand slipped backwards under my bed, it came to rest on something silky. I pulled it out and in my hands lay a flimsy, white nightgown that she had gotten me on christmas in our sixth year. I laughed despite myself,

_*flashback*_

_The sun grazed sleep out of my eyes, my eyelids fluttered open. I sat up quickly remembering what day it was, christmas, I knew it was childish, espeically for a sixteen year old guy, but when you had the girlfriend I did everyday was a happy day, espeically holidays when you get to spend every waking moment with her. I jumped out of bed, ready to run to her common room and take my darling to breakfast. _

_"Dude, you gonna open your presents first?" asked one of my friends_

_"I gotta go"_

_"Dude she can wait for five minutes, and besides wouldn't she want you to know what she got you?" he asked_

_"Good point", I jumped back on my bed and grabed the present from her, the others could wait. I stripped it open, and my friends burst out laughing. In my hands lay a flimsy, white nightgown._

_"You should try it on, then we can do your hair and put on make-up" said another 'friend'._

_"Shut up" I said, _what was she thinking?

_I walked up to her common room frustrated. She came bouncing down the stairs, her laugh was like a melody. I couldn't stay angry at her, she was to beautiful. _

_"Hi sweetie" she said and kissed my cheek._

_"Hi baby" I said_

_"Like your present?" she asked sweetly, I frowned_

_"Do you want me to wear it?" I asked, she laughed_

_"No silly" she took a step closer, she leaned in and nipped my earlobe. I shuddered, "It's for me to wear" she whispered seductivily, _

Just thinking about her and this happy moment made a smile streach across my tear streaked face, then thinking about all that had happened since then made me burst out in tears again.

**I told myself I won't miss you  
But I remember  
What it feels like beside you  
I really miss your hair in my face  
And the way your innocence tastes  
And I think you should know this  
You deserve much better than me  
**

_You wont miss her, shes better off you idiot! _Despite myself familer scents and feelings began wafting back to me. The smell of honeysuckle through her hair while she lay beside me in bed. They way she tasted so innocent, like the first day of spring. Her musical laugh, her sweet kisses, her cheerful personality, her, her, her everything. Tears zigg zagged down my cheeks. _I'm not good enough for her. _

**  
While looking through your old box of notes  
I found those pictures I took  
That you were looking for**

I looked under my bed for other things that would remind me of what I lost, that is a stupid idea, I know, it can only bring more pain, but I need to remember everything I can about her. I hand came across something hard, I pulled it out. In my hands was a wooden box, the box I kept everything special to me in. I slowly opened it, my hands shaking. I side was a small teddy I had since I was a baby, some photos, some bits of parchment, a silver necklace with a heart; she gave it back to me after our brake up. I picked up the parchment, trying to avoid the necklace. I groaned, the parchments was letter that she had sent to me during our first time apart, christmas in fifth year.

_My dearest,_

_I miss you already, I know it's only the first week of holidays but I can't stand being away from you, it's pure torture. I need you, to be in your arms, to feel your lips against mine. I know I'm being mushy and I'm not usually like this, but I usually have no reason to feel in pain as your always there. _

_Daddy wont let me stay at your house, he claims it's because I need to spend time with him, mother and my sibling but I know it's because he has an issue with your father. I asked him if you could stay here, guess what, he said no. I got so angry! Daddy says I'm being a dramatic teenager, I'm not. I'm doing it because he wont let me see my love, you. Look at me, I'm getting mushy again. Is it sad that I'm laughing at what I'm writing? Don't answer that, I know it is. _

_Well I should be going now, I don't want too, I want to write too you forever, but Daddy is calling me, I'll write again later._

_Love always,_

_Yours forever._

_Hi Honey!!!_

_I lovvvvvvvvvvvvvve the present you got me. I love the necklace, It's perfect!! Silver and simple are my favourite. Did you like your present sweetie? (Just so you know I'm laughing right now), I thought a bunny would be great for you! What did you name it??? get back to me A.S.A.P_

_Love you heaps,_

_Your baby flower._

I pulled out the photos and found they were all of me, her and our friends. One was taken on valentines day. We were standing in three feet deep snow outside honeydukes. We were kissing and laughing. It had been a fun day, her cheeks were a rosey pink against her pale skin, her copper hair bouncing in the wind. I shook with tears, I shoved the photos and the letters in the box and shoved it under my bed.

**  
If there's one memory I don't want to lose  
That time at the mall  
You and me in the dressing room  
I told myself I won't miss you  
But I remember  
What it feels like beside you  
I really miss your hair in my face  
And the way your innocence tastes  
And I think you should know this  
You deserve much better than me**

As much as I fought it, the letters brought back a flood of memories. I tried to fight them back but one memory slipped past.

_*Flashback*_

_"Hurry up" I whined_

_"Don't be whiny, I need to try on one more dress, ok baby" came a voice from the change room. _

_I sighed loudly, a chuckle came from the the change room. '_

_"Ok what do you think" She stepped into view, she wore a knee length, dark green dress. that suited her copper curls perfectly. She had a pair of strappy heels on that made her legs seem to travel forever. I could only gape._

_"Sweetie your making me blush" she said, I shut my mouth but kept staring. I stood up and walked over to her, I grabed her waist, not caring is anyone was watching. She stoped smiling and looked serious. I pulled her up into a deep kiss, she moaned into my mouth. She grabbed my shirt tightly and pulled me back into the change room, she shut the door and slammed me against the wall. I felt weak in the knees as she took complete control. _

_"R.." I began, _

_"Shh" she said and gently nipped my bottom lip. _

The bed I'm lying in is getting colder  
Wish I never would've said it's over  
And I can't pretend... I won't think about you when I'm older  
Cause we never really had our closure  
This can't be the end

I laid back on my bed, it feels so cold and stoney, none of her warmth is left in my sheets. I regret what I did so much, why did I have to dunp her? she forgave me! Thats it, she would forgive anything I did to her, she loved me to much and I took it all for fricken granted. I had hurt her heaps with what I did, I know that, but she would put it behind her to be with me, I couldn't let her do that. I going to regret doing that, hurting her then dumping her, for the rest of my life, she was, I mean is, my true love, despite how our fathers act.

**  
I really miss your hair in my face  
And the way your innocence tastes  
And I think you should know this  
You deserve much better than me  
I really miss your hair in my face  
And the way your innocence tastes  
And I think you should know this  
You deserve much better than me  
(And I think you should know this)  
(You deserve much better than me)  
**

I miss everything about that girl, my heart feels like someone ripped it out and stomped on it. I feel sick, I want her in my arms, I need her in my arms. But as I've said it so many times already one more wont hurt, she deserves much better than me.

"Hey baby, what's up?" asked Dominique coming to sit beisde me

"This is over" I said, I can't do this anymore, I didn't want to hurt Dominique but she is the reason that my flower was hurt in the first place.

"What?" she asked

"We are over" I said, she slapped me but I barely felt it, she got up and stormed off. No slap would ever sting me as much as the one _she _gave me when I broke up with her.


End file.
